Signs of NOT Changing
Signs of NOT Changing
- Does your partner tell you that you are the one that is abusive?
- Does your partner use Emerge group sessions or information against you in any way?
- Is your partner pressuring you to go to therapy for yourself or couples counseling for the two of you?
- Is your partner minimizing the abuse in the Emerge group? (You can ask the group leaders what your partner is reporting in the groups.)
- Does your partner demand a second chance?
- Does your partner say that it is impossible to change without your support?
- Does your partner try to get sympathy from you or the children?
- Do you have to keep after your partner to attend Emerge meetings and stay in the program?
- Does your partner expect something in return from you for attending Emerge?
- Is your partner pressuring you to make up your mind about the relationship or to move back in together?
- Is your partner pressuring you to drop criminal charges or your restraining order?
- Is your partner attempting to blackmail you into dropping criminal charges or your restraining order?
- Abusers may pressure you to stay with them while they attend Emerge; this is a tactic of abuse and control. If they are serious about changing, they will respect your wishes about the relationship.